The king of Junk

Girl, interrupted

I had been reading a book titled "Girl, interrupted" on the train for these few days. This is a true story based on the author's experience of her days when she was in a mental hospital from her age 17 to 20. The hospital was like a rehabilitation center where patients (most of them are teenage-girls) live together in a same building. It's nothing defferent from a normal high school dormitory, except for the fact that the residents need to take medicine & therapy everyday.

Anyway, I started wondering what the definition of "crazy" person.
Who is normal? and who's not?
The main charactor, the 17 year-old-girl could be both sane and insane, either sane or insane.
Her condition was like just like what most of us had when we were teenagers.
You know, you naturally keep wondering and can not be really sure what you wanna do, what you expect for the world, and how you could build up a good relationship with others.
And you are afraid of being different from others, coz if you act or think differently from others, then people might take you as "crazy".
People can never get rid of this fear, even after you get older, you are still unsure about things about yourself and yeah, it seems like everyone but you has already mastered the skill of living the life.
But this skill, even though it's very effective for some people's life, might not be necessary for your life. You must find out your own skill, you are the only who could discover the skill and improve it, according how your life goes.
But teenagers are too young to realize it, since they have lived in a limited world with family and school, and haved little ooportunity to brush up your view of the life.
No one to accept your charactor just because you are a bit different from others, and that leads you to start wondering, "Am I crazy to think like this? Am I crazy to act like that?"
How could other people manage this feeling?
Why am I treated as weird, though I am 100% normal in my world?
I don't understand what is bad about me, I don't get why I'm suffering from things so much, but I don't know, I don't know how to treat myself.
because, this is me. No one understand myself since no one could completely become me, no one could experience how I feel.

So, who decides who to be crazy and who to be normal?
If everyone act "crazy" would they be called "normal", and would "normal" people be "crazy"?
I don't know.
I just think.... it's bullshit to judge someone's personality.
Let the person to be himself/herself.

Ahhh... it's getting too complicated and I'm not smart enough to keep thinking about this...

posted by junkoba @ 4:58 PM